Garden hose on lap, silver nozzle. Time to spray monkeys. I lean forward on a stool, and stare at mo-mo-dialers. Drapes lifting: bananas in nets, top of a pole.

The first monkey climbs.

The ad said Hope-Investment Studies—lab setting. Didn’t say monkey-spraying. Hands-on experience with Doctoral Candidates.

Nothing but chatter.

I pull a trigger on the unsuspecting and douse: when monkeys are within three feet; when a light turns green.

$7.50 an hour.

A voice on the intercom—"Wake up, Mr. Foster!"

Bananas. What the experiment’s about.

“Sorry, Ms. Morrison, I won’t mess up again.”

Drowsy…boring baiting the labbed—monkeys trapped.

I stand up from my stool and wipe down the nozzle. Follow procedure: turn my head to the cameras up, right; nod to the ones on my left. Peer down into the fireman’s hole.

The Nogee tank is running hot tonight, and it’s time to pull the trigger.